Case of the Blahs

I seem to have successfully lost all motivation today. My triathlon is on Sunday and right now I just don’t care. Today I wanted to do a couch 2 5k day and maybe do a swim workout afterward. I’m just finding it extremely difficult to muster up the energy to follow through with it. I even know I need to workout because I haven’t been eating very well and working out will help me turn that around.

Andrew is napping, but maybe when he gets up he’ll want to go to the gym with me. If someone else were going to the gym with me, I would be more motivated. Sigh.

Also, I hate Xbox Music. The UI is screwed and doing what should be an easy task, like searching for a sing and adding it to a playlist, is quite complex and difficult. Stupid Xbox Music. #bitter


The Danger Zone

The past few months I’ve been running hot and cold with my healthy living journey. When something external happens that stresses me out, it is the first thing to go. Even though I know it shouldn’t be! So, after a few weeks of whining and being super lazy, I’m back at it. Today I made a to do list with meal planning and working out at the top.  Today I worked out for the first time in a while. I’m back at the beginning of Couch 2 5K. I’ve never been a runner and for the most part I really hate it. However, it’s different cardio from spinning and I have an app on my phone that has all the intervals. I don’t have to think all that much to do it, which is always something I want from going to the gym. As an added bonus, running doesn’t require any extra equipment, even though I go to the gym and run on the treadmill. I also made some notes for what I want to eat this week. There’s some mozzarella in the fridge that needs to be used up, so that’s a recurring theme for my meals.

I’ve worked out and I’ve meal planned (roughly), but what I really want to write about is the Danger Zone. The Danger Zone is days 4-14 of getting back into the swing of things when I really need to stay on top of my work outs and my eating. It really stems from patience and motivation. More specifically, my lack of it! After eating healthily and working for a few days (even just one), I want to be able to see a real difference. You know, a 10-pound difference. I’m just so impatient! I constantly forget that my body needs 1-2 weeks to actually process the good things I’ve done for it. I want the results now!  It makes it extremely hard for me to not give up after a few days citing “no results.” After about two weeks, I can see the results or at least feel them, so I’ve left the Danger Zone.

To try to combat my lack of patience and to try to increase my motivation during the Danger Zone, I think I’m going to create a vision board. Way back when I lived in Colorado, I had a nifty one that I liked. Since then I’ve been collecting pictures that I like, meaning to put them together. I’ve also gotten out a pair of my jeans that I want to fit into again. I’m going to hang them in the bedroom so I see them in the morning.

Any other tips for surviving the Danger Zone?

Being Honest

Today I’m going to be very honest.  This isn’t unusual.  I’m a very honest person, but I don’t write my entire life on this blog; it’s often confined to my workouts or most recent kitchen adventure.  Today is me trying to vent and to get myself going.  Let’s hope it works.

Lately, I’ve been so hard on my body.  It’s been awful.  I haven’t been eating as well as I should have.  I feel like I tumbled down a very large hill and landed in a pile of fast food, Nutella, and Dove ice cream bars.  I’ve been flip-flopping with being upset with myself and letting it go.  On one hand, I’m so upset with myself since I know how to eat.  On the other hand I’m trying not to be too hard on myself because everyone makes mistakes.  But, if I’m not upset with myself, how do I incorporate accountability into my life?

Not only has my eating been slipping, but so has working out.  I swam twice last week.  I need to swim/work out more often.  I’m thinking at least three times a week.  I had a nice conversation with my mom and I told her I was feeling moody lately.  She mentioned it might be because I’m not working out as often as I used to be, so I’m not getting a regular shot of endorphins.  I think she’s right.  I feel drained and not as happy as I want to be.  This means even though I’m trying to pursue some side projects, working out does not get to fall by the wayside.

I feel like I have so much to do that I’m completely overwhelmed and frozen.  I’ve been procrastinating simple and essential tasks, like answering email (the kind that doesn’t require a novel-length response).  It’s ridiculous.  I did not used to be like this.  I keep telling myself to get off my ass and go be productive and do something.  It never seems to work.  Ulgh.  It’s like I have no motivation and my energy has been sucked dry.  I need someone to kick my butt into gear!

I’m continually blaming the fact that I’ve been perpetually non-productive on the fact that my desk isn’t set up.  Perhaps if I stop procrastinating that task, everything else will fall into place.  I just want to have everything unpacked and put away.  Right now, it seems that the phrase that can best sum up my life is: Perfect is the enemy of the good (Voltaire).

So, asking for help is great and everything, but at the end of the day, I’m accountable to myself and no one else can shoulder that responsibility.  Damn it, Ed, go do something!!

July in Review

Sorry about the two review posts in a row.  I really like to look back at what my months and weeks are like so I can get an idea of what works well and keep myself accountable.  After the review, I’ll do a nice update.

Swim 2x week: At the beginning of the month I was really good about this.  I’ve been traveling a lot these past couple weeks, so I haven’t gotten in the pool as much as I’ve wanted.  On the bright side, I found my membership card so I can stop having the person working the desk look up my membership.  Yay!

Bike 1x week (biking to work counts): I’m going to go ahead and call this a success.  I remember biking at least three times.  Next week, I’m going to have to fit in some brick workouts with biking to prepare myself for my triathlon and the Venus de Miles event.

Half marathon training plan: This month I decided to repeat week 4.  I haven’t been as strong with this goal as I wanted to be, so I’m going to count it as a half success.  It turns out running is really difficult for me when traveling and the days before I’m going to be traveling since I’m focusing on getting things prepped to go.  This is definitely something that I can work on.

Continue tracking what I eat: During the week I’m pretty good about tracking; it’s the weekends that sometimes slip away from me.  Tracking is really helpful for me, so I at least keep a mental list in my head when I can’t write it down immediately.

Sleep at least 7 hours a night: So-so.  The alarm on my new phone is really nifty.  When I set an alarm, it tells me how much time there is until the alarm.  I think I need to start taking advantage of that feature and set my alarm for at least 7 hours from the time I set it.

Move to Boulder: SUCCESS!  I’m all moved to Boulder.  I just have to clean out my car and unpack my desk and what’s left of my wardrobe.

Read 1 health/fitness book: Hopefully I’ll finish this up on my way back from New York on Sunday.

WordPress tutorial: I’m giving my workshop on Saturday; I just need to practice now.

Side project: I didn’t get anything done on this.  I’m going to postpone this until September.

This week I had my Gap Magic appointment, which was awesome!  One thing I’ve discovered about myself is that I get really lazy after seeing quite decent results.  I’m so excited that I’ve lost weight and have gone down at least a size, but now I’m feeling really lazy.  It’s sort of as if I think that after I lose weight I can go back to how I used to eat and workout which was not terribly healthy and rarely.  Don’t get me wrong, I love eating healthy and working out makes me so strong, but sometimes I find it exhausting.  I guess after some milestone is met or positive result seen, I think “Oh good, I can go back to the easy way now.”  Because as Mary said, it’s hard work.

I love working out with Ty because I always feel like I get a full body cardio and weights workout, but my session with him on Monday was awful.  I was in a terrible mood and much more difficult than usual.  At the end of the session he decided to start retraining me to run.  There’s apparently a difference between running and jogging and it’s not just speed.  I won’t lie, that was really hard for me.  I wasn’t very good at it, I had to think to stay on the treadmill (I have a fear of falling) and I was thinking about what my feet were doing and which muscles were supposed to be engaged.  It was a lot for me.  I don’t like being a beginner again and I just wanted to cry because I couldn’t make everything work together.  I know I just need practice, but at the time I felt like a pretty big failure.

Between a poor Monday and my lazy feeling from Sunday, Tuesday wasn’t exactly a day of stellar choices.  I went to a movie with some friends and we went out to California Pizza Kitchen.  I ordered the Pear and Gorgonzola pizza with whole wheat crust.  I ate half of it and it was delicious!  About a year ago I went to California Pizza Kitchen and I devoured an entire pizza.  I guess it’s actually a pretty good sign that I ate half of my pizza and took the rest home.  Right?

After dinner, I went grocery shopping to stock up on fruits and veggies (hello melons and bell peppers!) and to get the ingredients for granola!  Then I went out salsa dancing.  Dancing was super fun and thoroughly sweaty.  I always love to go out dancing and I go out even when I have other stuff to do (like laundry, cleaning, cooking, running, writing, anything)!  When I got back, I had two pieces of BeauJo’s mountain pie that were left over from Sunday.  Not exactly the epitome of healthy, but I did enjoy every bite!  I love eating out and treating myself, but I think I need to cutback on that.  Two to three times a week is a little much.

I’ve been lazy for a couple of days, but I think I’m ready to ramp up for my next goals.  I’m hoping to post some photos from my Gap Magic appointment this afternoon, so be on the lookout for that!  Tomorrow should be a post of my goals for August and some transportation adventures 🙂

Motivational Vision Collage

After months of prepping and meaning to “get around to it,” I finally made my vision collage!  It was actually really fun to make.  I’m moving this weekend, so I haven’t put it up anywhere yet, but I can’t wait to find a permanent home for it.  I think I’m going to try subscribing to some health magazines so I can make another to continue to keep me motivated.

I’m a visual person, so seeing encouraging pictures and words is really motivating for me.  Jen over at Prior Fat Girl asked the question: Do you every blow your goals up and display them hugely, in-your-face like? Well, Jen, although my goals do involve my weight, what I really want is to be healthy, strong, and fit.  My vision collage reminds me of that!

Motivational Vision Collage

My Motivational Vision Collage

I have positive words (Powerful, Stronger, Adventure), motivational phrases (You are beautiful, Get strong & sexy, Float like a butterfly Sting like a bee), and great pictures (running, biking, dancing, before/after, and a biking triathlete*).  Love it!

Hopefully my vision collage will inspire me when I’m not feeling motivated…we’ll find out!

*How to know it’s a triathlete: 1) The cycling shoes have one velcro strap instead of three to help transitions go faster and 2) Her kit is by TYR (the logo is covered up), a swimming company, so it’s probably a tri-specific kit.  I feel so in-the-know and observant! 🙂  If you can’t tell, I’m really excited for my sprint triathlon in August!

Do you have a vision collage?  Post a link to it, I’d love to see it!